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Sunny is a contributing writer at The Hudsucker. Born and raised in Atlanta, she graduated with a degree in Journalism, concentrating in Public Relations, from Georgia State University in 2009. Sunny now lives in Midtown and works as a Digital Media Specialist in the Greater Atlanta Area. Being a passionate lover of good food, art of all kinds, friendly people and home-brewed Southern sweet tea, Sunny couldn't imagine a better place to call home. Follow Sunny on Twitter @SociallySunny.

The Quarter-Life Crisis: Always the Bridesmaid, Never the Bride

I live in Georgia, where the summers are long, humid and smoggy. I know you wouldn’t think this if you’ve ever heard a country song describing Georgia, but trust me, it’s nothing to sing home about.

The only thing that makes southern summers worse is the fact that it’s wedding season. Not only do I have to deal with being bear-hugged to the point of suffocation by this choking, enveloping heat every time I step foot outside, but I also have to sit outdoors, in a fancy dress that probably doesn’t breathe well, sweating beads through my make up and completely undoing the hours I probably just spent making my hair look somewhat presentable.

Source: Kimberly Reed Photography

Source: Kimberly Reed Photography

Summer used to be a thing to look forward to, filled with days at the pool, lake, or beach. Careless days spent being mindlessly idle are an entirely different beast all together during the big QLC. Everyone and their mom is getting married. Well, not to each other, because that’s illegal and highly frowned upon in society, but seriously, everyone—I mean everyone—is getting married.

At first, in your early twenties, it’s kind of fun because not many of your friends are married yet. So, it’s rare and exciting. “What am I going to wear?” “I LOVE THE ELECTRIC SLIDE!” “ I can’t miss the bouquet toss!” These are some thoughts that could potentially run through your naive and innocent mind.  It’s all so new and just like the movies, everything is so wonderful, blah, blah, blah. But then, when people at Bed, Bath and Beyond start greeting you by name because you’re printing registries there so often, or the socially awkward David’s Bridal associate that rudely and underhandedly points out how, in all the times you’ve been there, you’re never the one in white, things get real. You get to the point to when you hear the DJ spin Beyonce’s “Single Ladies,” your feet get heavy, because your soul has collapsed into them.

Source: Brides.com

You drag those feet, deflated soul and the rest of you begrudgingly to the front of the reception hall, in front of everyone, like you’re marching to your own execution. You and the only 3 other single girls in this entire place, that have been caught like little fishes by well-meaning wedding go-ers, report to the Corner of Pity, where you’re expected to battle to the death for a bouquet of fake flowers that symbolizes a tiny bit of hope that you won’t die alone. Um, no thanks. This is not the Hunger Games, friends. And if it was, I would take myself out if the only prize I got for survival was a superstitious promise and used flowers.

So, large doses of skepticism aside, how do you survive this season without committing either homicide or suicide? Well, here are a few tips!

Take an Awesome Date

Weddings, though hectic and crazy, can actually be really fun. Find someone to make the entire experience an enjoyable one. Forget taking someone you just met that you have to be formal and polite around. No, no. Take someone who knows you well, whose humor matches yours and who will sit and judge people’s outfits with you . The person who doesn’t mind being the first one on the dance floor. Someone who encourages you to kick off your heels, let down your hair, and just have a great time. You need a great time enabling date, and more times than not, this person is probably your best friend.

Be a Good Friend

Remember the reason you’re there. Someone consciously decided they wanted to share one of the biggest moments of their lives with you. Be respectful and aware of that. Go out of your way to be helpful and do whatever you can to make sure things run as close to perfect as possible. If you keep yourself involved, you not only contribute to something special, but you’re also too preoccupied to wallow.

Don’t Be A Debbie Downer

Source: Universal Studios

No offense if your name is Debbie. But seriously, it might be a little dramatic (read: annoying) to everyone else if you’re sitting in a corner worrying over if you’ll ever be loved or not. Just remember, if Honey Boo Boo’s mom found someone…I’m willing to bet you will, too. It’s just not your time yet. Unless you’re crazy, in which case your chances highly increase at weddings. (More about how guys love crazy women in a following article.)

You Have a Small Window of Freedom, er, I Mean Singledom

The thing people forget often is that you’re only single for 10 to maybe 15 years on average of your “adult” life.  Marriage is FOREVER, folks. Unless you’re Kim Kardashian, once you tie the knot, it’s typically tied for a really, really long time. It’s as though you’re freaking out and rushing to get to this destination, but you’re forgetting that once you’re there, you’re there for the rest of your days. So, enjoy the journey. Drive slower, take in the scenery, stop by for a snowcone or two. That’s all I’m trying to say. You’ll get there when you get there, but rest assured, you will get there.

Be Determined to Have a Good Time

Seriously, throw down. Dance like a fool, drink like a pirate, eat like a champion. Plan an awesome after party with your table mates. Weddings are a great place to make new friends, so make the effort to. Make this an awesome night to be remembered time and time again.

Overall, it is wedding season. It’s unavoidable, and you’re going to have to partake. So why not make the most of it? Because you have a Pinterest board devoted to your special day that you’re dying to actualize? Seriously, slow your roll. Wedding season means it’s fun season as well. It’s seeing people you might not otherwise see so often, eating delicious food, drinking on someone else’s tab and getting to wear that party dress that usually sits in the back of your closet. Go partake in this joyful occasion and enjoy your ride.

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One Comment on “The Quarter-Life Crisis: Always the Bridesmaid, Never the Bride”

  1. Kathleen Horgan July 3, 2014 at 4:31 pm #

    Sunny, you are brilliant and I love you! I know firsthand how great it is to be at a wedding with you. <3

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