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Reality TV shows and those couples you know who overshare on social media usually point to the idea that walking down the aisle with “the one” is evitable. And while you might dream of that day too with your partner,
However, according to the American Psychological Association, 40 to 50 percent of marriages today will end in divorce, which means are culture that is flooded with a “happily ever after,” is not exactly what we put it all up to be.
If you’ve had second thoughts that affect how you feel and make you unhappy for months leading up to the big day, that’s more than just cold feet. It might be time to reflect and tell your wedding planner to sit tight because you might want to rethink that important life decision.
Being sneaky and doubtful
When it comes to be a being a private, introverted person or being secretive, you need to know the clear-cut differences. Healthy relationships mean honesty and willing to share certain details of your life, but if you are comfortable hiding secrets with your partner, that means you’ve flexed that muscle too much and are on the verge of telling bigger lies.
On the contrary, if doubt your partner, listen to your intuition. While friendship is a strong pillar of love, it’s also rooted in trust and and anything less is an gauge for a faulty union. The Journal of Family Psychology suggests women who have doubts prior to tying the knot are expressively more likely to be unhappy several years later and have comparatively high divorce rates.
Not loving your partner for who they are based on a lack of communication
Love is the number one reason to get married. But that also means you need to love your partner for who they are in the present moment. If they say they are not into having kids or taking off with their dream, but you believe they’ll change themselves or their ideals down the road, you’re not ready. Because people rarely change, the illusion of marriage transforming a partner is just a pipe dream. Real love is about acceptance, mutual respect and goals, while growing together, not apart.
A big part of this is also communication. If you can’t discuss important issues like money, religion, sex, or the potential for expanding your family with your partner, you will run into major issues. If these are unresolved, it can lead to unhealthy relationship traits that don’t offer much reason to stay together.
Dating for less than two years
Sometimes we find “the one” that sparks an unparalleled happiness in our soul, but if you’ve been dating for less than two years, you are not be ready for marriage. While there are no hard and fast rules for any relationships, researchers report holding off longer to marry your partner leads to long-term marital satisfaction and lower chances of divorce.
A study from Penn State University suggests couples who dated an average of two years before marriage were actually more happily married than those who dated less than a year. Likewise, researchers at Emory University found those who dated three or more years were 39 percent less likely to get a divorce than those who had dated less than a month to a year. Ouch! Science says this might be because it takes roughly a year beyond initial infatuation associated with newness and insecurity, and another year to see if it will really last.
The Hudsucker 
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